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Dr. Demento Presents The Greatest Novelty Christmas CD Of All TimeNovelty songs and Christmas music have a complex relationship. Many of the most loved Christmas records are novelty songs. And those same songs are also among the most hated Christmas records. Skeptics would say that all Christmas music is a novelty - that it's not a genre to be taken seriously. Well, those grinches can take a hike, but most great Christmas rockers have an element of the ridiculous in them, intended or not. Regardless, many of the best-selling Christmas records have, in fact, been novelties - and I've got the charts to prove it. "All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth" (Spike Jones), "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer," (Elmo & Patsy), "Nuttin' For Christmas" (Barry Gordon), and "The Chipmunk Song" all rank in the all-time top Christmas songs on the Billboard charts, at least in the pre-digital era.

On Dr. Demento Presents The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time (1989), the high priest of musical hilarity exposes the best of this rarified subgenre. Dr. Demento was the weird, wild, and wacky radio persona of Barry Hansen, a California disc jockey and music writer. Initially, Hansen specialized in rock 'n' roll oldies, but he found his calling when his show swerved into novelty records. By 1974, Dr. Demento was a nationally syndicated phenomenon - at least among geeks, nerds, and record fiends like us. While he'd already compiled several LP's worth of novelties for Warner Brothers and other labels, his six-volume 1985 series for then-indie Rhino, Dr. Demento Presents The Greatest Novelty Records Of All Time, was easily the most ambitious project Hansen had ever undertaken. The sixth volume covered Christmas music, and The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time is essentially an expanded reissue of that album. It featured 10 of the 12 original LP tracks, plus six additional songs. It was the only volume of the vinyl series to get reissued on compact disc - which tells you something about the enduring popularity of Christmas novelties.

The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time was part of a loose series of compilations on Rhino Records documenting the history of recorded holiday music across a dizzying variety of genres including country, jazz, blues, doo wop, reggae, punk, new wave, and swing. Dr. Demento's contribution filled an important, if eccentric, gap in the series (read more).

Dr. Demento Presents The Greatest Novelty Records of All Time Vol. 6The Greatest? Maybe. Perfect? Nope.

Unless you are Muhammed Ali, calling yourself "The Greatest" is risky business. But, The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time pretty much lives up to its title. First, it includes all those best-sellers mentioned above - though it substitutes Stan Freberg's gentle parody of "Nuttin' For Christmas" for Barry Gordon's kiddie pop. Of the rest, most were singles, some of those were hits, and nearly all have become holiday favorites.

Highlights include purely comedic tracks from hippie stoners Cheech & Chong, Allan Sherman (of "Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah" fame), and Doug & Bob McKenzie (played by SCTV cast members Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas), as well as musical numbers that range from quaint (Yogi Yorgesson's "I Yust Go Nuts At Christmas") to just plain weird (Gayla Peevey's "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas"). Generally speaking, fun peaks when the brain goes on holiday, but several cuts score a higher I.Q. - most notably Tom Lehrer's jaundiced "Christmas Carol" and no less than three acerbic Stan Freberg songs. To his credit, Dr. Demento selected mostly songs that adults can find humor in, not just children and puerile adolescents. I mean, I love a good fart joke, but there's more to comedy than that.

Speaking of which, there are a few genuine stinkers on The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD, including tracks by Weird Al Yankovic, Kip Addotta, and Wild Man Fischer. And, as popular as they are, I find the selections by the Singing Dogs, Elmo & Patsy, and the Chipmunks truly annoying. It can be argued that we really don't need to hear those songs ever again - they are burned into our brains, for better or worse. But, that means they have achieved a certain timelessness, no matter what I think. Like all entertainers, the Demented One must play to the cheap seats. So, let's all howl along for another chorus of "Jingle Bells," holler for Alvin one more time, and shed a tear for the old lady with hoof prints on her ass. Simply stated, The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time lives up to its billing, and any Christmas collection would be incomplete without it.

Dr. Demento's Holidays In DementiaThe Demento Universe

The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time contained mostly music of historical significance, and it was laden with musical best-sellers - even if all the performers were primarily comedians. They created their records, put them on the market, and the marketplace responded. Dr. Demento's Rhino follow-up Holidays In Dementia (1995) consists almost exclusively of music created since his tenure on the radio began in 1970. Moreover, many of the tracks were created by or for Dr. Demento's particular, off-kilter audience, and very few were actual hit records. Sadly, many of them sound like they were created by one guy in a studio, often laden with programmed drums and other synthesizers.

In essence, the popular Dr. Demento Show triggered a musical Hawthorne effect, where musicians began to behave differently because they knew they were being observed. Artists like the Hollytones or Gefilte Joe & The Fish created music specifically for Dr. Demento and his followers. They may have been stars within the "Demento Universe," but they were complete unknowns everywhere else. So, to an outsider, the self-referential jokes on Holidays In Dementia fall flat - and the music sounds lame - so there's not a lot to like.

As an aside, it's worth noting that Weird Al Yankovic - who was featured on The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD but is conspicuously absent from Holidays In Dementia - was an exception. He got his start on Dr. Demento's show, but he eventually became a well-known artist with actual hit records. "If there hadn't been a Dr. Demento," Weird Al later explained, "I'd probably have a real job now." We can argue about the quality of his music (don't get me started), but he was inarguably a success.

Anyway, the only track that really stuck with me from this Demento Universe was "Hanukkah Homeboy" (1992) by Doc Mo Shé, a real-life veterinarian who Dr. Demento claims in his liner notes had "risen to the head of the (admittedly rather small) class of Jewish comedy rappers." On "Hanukkah Homeboy," Doc Mo Shé sounds enough like the Beastie Boys to give the track a little heft, and his deft rhymes about the Hebrew holiday score some real laughs. That said, I think the funniest line follows "downing jugs of Manischewitz," a kosher wine, when he shrugs and admits, "Nothing rhymes with Manischewitz." Basically, it's the Jewish "Rappin' Rodney," but at least it doesn't sound like it was recorded in his garage.

Dr. Demento , 20th Anniversary CollectionThe Bright Side of Dementia

All that said, nearly half the records on Holidays In Dementia were created outside the Demento Universe, and they fall into several categories. First, three songs were simply created during an earlier era, and all are significant to folks who love hip Christmas music:

  • "Happy New Year" (1948) by Spike Jones & His City Slickers was the original b-side of Spike Jones' #1 hit "All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth." It's a surprisingly rare recording, appearing almost nowhere else since the dawn of digital music. That's a shame, because it's a classic Spike Jones track, employing every literal bell and whistle in the City Slickers' arsenal and including verses from nearly every character in their cast: baby-voiced George Rock (who sang "Two Front Teeth"), "Sir Frederick Gas" (Earl Bennett), "Professor Beetlebaum" (Doodles Weaver), and Spike Jones himself.
  • "Santa Claus Is Watching You" (1962) was one of the earliest hit singles by Ray Stevens, the man who would go onto a long career as a musical comedian, most famously with the #1 hit "The Streak" (1974).
  • "The Pretty Little Dolly" by Mona Abboud was recorded live on "The Tonight Show" in 1966 (you can hear Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon laughing) but not released until 1980. It starts like a children's song and ends up so risqué and sadistic that I am surprised NBC let it air, given the standards of the day.

Two songs on Holidays In Dementia date from more recent times but were created far outside the Demento Universe. Disc jockey Bob River's "The Twelve Pains Of Christmas" (1987) is from Twisted Christmas, the first of several holiday parody albums he released. Simply put, I am not a fan. I do get a kick out of Father Guido Sarducci, a character created in the early 70's by comedian Don Novello that later became famous on NBC's Saturday Night Live. His "Santa's Lament" (1995), a collaboration with Joe Walsh of all people, is amusing, but it doesn't measure up to his work on SNL. He's created several holiday songs over the years - this one released only to radio in 1991 - all later collected on a digital EP, One Hundred Bulbs On The Christmas Tree Party (2006)

Two other songs are genuine oddities that Dr. Demento plucked out of thin air. They aren't funny, or at least they weren't intended to be. They are, well, odd. The first, Jona Lewie's "Stop The Cavalry" (1980), is a strange little song about the holidays during wartime that became a huge hit and enduring favorite in England. Even stranger, it was waxed for Stiff Records, famous for punk and new wave music by artists like Elvis Costello, Madness, and the Damned. Joseph Spence, meanwhile, was a Bahamian folk singer, and his improvised 1972 live performance of "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" is more like a raspberry blown in his audience's face than a novelty record. It made a little more sense in the context of Mas! A Caribbean Christmas Party, a Rykodisc collection from a couple of years earlier, but it makes no sense whatsoever on Holidays In Dementia.

Finally, the Waitresses' "Christmas Wrapping" (1981) just doesn't belong here. It's true that the New York new wave band used a lot of humor in their music. Songs such as "I Know What Boys Like" and "Thinking About Sex Again" were as funny as they were caustic. But, "Christmas Wrapping" is only wryly humorous, and it's a freakin' awesome record - one of my Top 100 Songs, in fact. But, novelty song? No way.

The Very Best Of Dr. DementoPostscript

The Dr. Demento Show peaked in popularity in the 1980's but remained on the air well into the 21st century. It would eventually become a web-based service, offering new broadcasts and a lot of archives. In 1991, Rhino fêted the good doctor with a deluxe two-CD set celebrating his 20th anniversary on the air, followed by similar, all-new sets for his 25th anniversary (1995) and 30th anniversary (2000). Together they document the history of the novelty song from Spike Jones' 1942 Nazi spoof, "Der Feuhrer's Face," though Dr. Demento Show favorites like Barnes & Barnes' "Fish Heads" (1979) and Weird Al Yankovic's "Smells Like Nirvana" (1992). Admittedly, that's a lot of dementia, and a lot of people might prefer the single-disc collection The Very Best Of Dr. Demento (2001).

Also, I briefly mentioned that two songs were omitted when The Greatest Novelty Records Of All Time Volume VI made the leap to CD. One of them, "Santa And The Satellite" by Buchanan & Goodman (1957), is a true classic reflecting the madcap spirit of its times and the frenetic energy of early rock 'n' roll. It's a "break-in" record, a microgenre that Dickie Goodman all but owned with hits like "Flying Saucer" in the 50's and "Mr. Jaws" in the 70's. But, thanks to complex licensing issues, finding decent-sounding original recordings of his hits - "Santa And The Satellite" included - can be tough.

The other missing track is "Wreck The Halls With Boughs Of Holly" by the Three Stooges, one of six songs they recorded in 1959 for a children's label called Little Golden Records and previously reissued by Rhino in 1983 as Christmas Time With The Three Stooges. The album is cute but corny, recorded long after the Stooges had lost their comedic edge. But if, like me, you grew up watching their slapstick short films on afternoon TV, you'll get a kick out of it.

Like most of the Rhino compilations, The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time and Holidays In Dementia did not make the leap to the world of downloads and streaming. Unlike the other compilations, a lot of these tracks may be hard to find online. Happy hunting and, as Dr. Demento said at the end of every show, always remember to stay demented. [top of page]

Albums Albums

SongsEssential Songs

  • - The Greatest Novelty Records Of All Time Volume VI: Christmas (1985)
  • All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth (Spike Jones, 1948) Top 100 Song
  • A Christmas Carol (Tom Lehrer, 1959)
  • Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer (Elmo 'n' Patsy, 1982)
  • Green Christmas (Stan Freberg, 1958)
  • I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas (Gayla Peevey, 1953)
  • I Yust Go Nuts At Christmas (Yogi Yorgesson, 1949)
  • Nuttin' For Christmas (Stan Freberg, 1955)
  • Santa And The Satellite (Buchanan & Goodman, 1957) Top 100 Song
  • Santa Claus And His Old Lady (Cheech & Chong, 1971)
  • The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas (Allan Sherman, 1963)
  • Wreck The Halls With Boughs Of Holly (Three Stooges, 1959)
  • - The Greatest Christmas Novelty CD Of All Time (1989)
  • All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth (Spike Jones, 1948) Top 100 Song
  • The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late) (The Chipmunks with the Music of David Seville, 1958)
  • A Christmas Carol (Tom Lehrer, 1959)
  • Christmas Dragnet (Stan Freberg, 1953)
  • Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer (Elmo 'n' Patsy, 1982)
  • Green Christmas (Stan Freberg, 1958)
  • I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas (Gayla Peevey, 1953)
  • I Yust Go Nuts At Christmas (Yogi Yorgesson, 1949)
  • Jingle Bells (Singing Dogs, 1956)
  • Nuttin' For Christmas (Stan Freberg, 1955)
  • Santa Claus And His Old Lady (Cheech & Chong, 1971)
  • The Twelve Days Of Christmas (Bob & Doug McKenzie, 1981)
  • The Twelve Gifts Of Christmas (Allan Sherman, 1963)
  • - Holidays In Dementia (1995)
  • Christmas Wrapping (Waitresses, 1981) Top 100 Song
  • Hanukkah Homeboy (Doc Mo Shé, 1992)
  • Happy New Year (Spike Jones & His City Slickers, 1948)
  • The Pretty Little Dolly (Mona Abboud, 1966)
  • Santa Claus Is Watching You (Ray Stevens, 1962)
  • Santa's Lament (Father Guido Sarducci, 1995)
  • Stop The Cavalry (Jona Lewie, 1980)

Further ListeningFurther Listening

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