A Christmas Gift For You

2023

JP, Chrissie & The Fairground Boys, Christmas Soon (2010)
For a while, at least, Chrissie Hynde - once and future leader of the Pretenders - was building quite the history of public romances and subsequent trainwrecks. She was rather infamously the "adultress" who broke up head Kink Ray Davies' marriage, and in 2010 she announced she'd found the perfect lover in John-Paul "JP" Jones, an up-and-coming Welsh singer/songwriter nearly half her age. "We met in a bar," said Hynde at the time, "and we were both pretty drunk." The pair jetted off to Cuba for a brief, torrid affair that resulted in a new band and a flurry of press coverage but, ultimately, just one album - the unwisely titled Fidelity - and the all-but-lost holiday single "Christmas Soon." The affair was apparently also the death knell for Jones' career, who subsequently produced very little music. At any rate, the song is pretty great - rousing pub rock that spotlights Jones' hangdog vocals and wizened lyrics, relegating Hynde to a largely supporting role. Reminds me of the Hothouse Flowers, or if that reference is too obscure, Van Morrison.

Anyway, "Christmas Soon" was released as a digital single and included as a bonus track on some editions of the album. But, the album is out-of-print - though not terribly rare - and the single can't be streamed, at least where I live. I can see it on Spotify, but the play button is greyed out, and it's disappeared altogether from Amazon and Apple Music - so here it is!

Sonny Columbus & The Del Fuegos, That Punchbowl Full Of Joy (1980)
If you've been following this annual tradition for a while, you've been able to download three of the five songs on one of my favorite albums, the 1983 EP A Boston Rock Christmas. Well, this year you get the fourth, and it's the best track - and the only original song on the all-too-brief EP. I'll refer you to my review to learn more about the song - a paean to drunken debauchery - but I am pleased to report that I've learned more about the mysterious Mr. Columbus. Thanks to the interwebs, I finally caught up to the fact that Sonny Columbus was the stage name of one James Ryan, who was originally from Columbus, Ohio. He was best known for playing in another Beantown band, the Swinging Erudites, who were a lounge revival act before there even was such a thing, and his day gig was running the Hoodoo Barbecue, a legendary musician's hangout. Among other things, the Hoodoo employed about half the Del Fuegos, who didn't yet have the major label record contract that would make them one of the best-known alternative rock acts of the 1980's.

I'm sharing it here, but "Punchbowl Full Of Joy" is the only song from Boston Rock Christmas to have ever been issued on CD. It was included on a benefit album called Ho Ho Ho Spice in 2002 - never easy to find and long out-of-print.

The Maggots, Get Off My Roof (2007)
The Maggots are a garage rock band from Stockholm, Sweden, who recorded four albums in the early 21st century. In what appears to be one of their last official acts, they recorded "Get Off My Roof" for a 2007 digital release called "Little Steven's Underground Garage Christmas EP" sold briefly through the Wicked Cool Records website - not Amazon and iTunes or any of the usual suspects. The following year, the other three tracks on the EP by the Len Price 3, Chesterfield Kings, and Cocktail Slippers would be included on Little Steven's fantastic compilation, Christmas A Go-Go. But, the Maggots' trashy treasure would disappear into the ether - until now. "Get Off My Roof" is a cover of a Christmas novelty song adapted from the Rolling Stones' "Get Off My Cloud" and was originally recorded in 1965 by Jerry & The Landslides, a one-off project featuring former radio disk jockey and TV actor Jerry Worsham. The Landslides record is a total goof, but the Maggots, to their eternal credit, rock the living shit out of it.

Three Wise Men, Countdown to Christmas Party Time (1983)
At this late date, most Christmas music fiends know about "Thanks For Christmas," a whimsical song written by Andy Partridge and recorded by his band, arch English rockers XTC, under the pseudonym Three Wise Men. It was released as a non-LP 45-rpm single backed with the dance-oriented, even-less-serious "Countdown To Christmas Party Time." "Thanks For Christmas" has been anthologized a few times, most notably on Rhino's excellent New Wave Xmas (1996). And, both songs appeared on the 1990 rarities compilation, Rag and Bone Buffet - an essential purchase for XTC maniacs, but something of an extravagance for the rest of us. Regardless, Rag and Bone Buffet has been out-of-print for years, and it's never been released for download or streaming. So, I am including it here as a little something special in your digital stocking.

Concrete Blonde, Cruel World (2011)
Initially, at least, Concrete Blonde got marketed as a punk (later alternative) band, but I never thought that label fit them very well. They could rock like crazy, it's true - check out "Still In Hollywood" or "God Is A Bullet" - but they had a studied, literary sensibility that belied any resemblance to, say, Nirvana. This was in no small part thanks to frontwoman Johnette Napolitano, who as a writer and singer is closer to Grace Slick or Stevie Nicks than Courtney Love. Their biggest hit, "Joey" (1990), certainly doesn't sound anything like the Ramones, and the band started drifted farther towards dark, gothic themes the longer they stayed together. The gloomy "Cruel World" was cut many years later, and it certainly fits my theory. As a holiday song, it's an incredible bummer, addressing hunger and homelessness in a not-at-all chipper fashion. All the same, the angel in Napolitano's dark vision leads her to action, and there's hope in that. The song doesn't actually mention the holiday, either, but that's how the band presented it, with cover art depicting a Christmas tree.

"Cruel World" was written, by the way, not by Napolitano but by Paul Simpson, aka Horizontal Paul, a paraplegic artist in the UK. At the time, at least, he also ran a mobile recording studio helping other disabled artists make music. His efforts impressed Napolitano enough to buy one of his albums and cover a song. All that said, the song was sold only through now-defunct CD Baby, and it has disappeared from the face of the cruel, cruel world.

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